John


My co-worker and fellow blogger shared this article with me in which the columnist challenged people, in the new year and the new decade, to look at a few things through fresh eyes. The writer listed 52 suggestions, one for every week of the year. This week’s topic is Your Spouse.

The No. 1 thing I love about you — that I loved about you from the beginning — is your spontaneity. Before you, I had never before gone to a movie theater at the drop of hat and saw what ever movie was playing next. Do you know how unsettling that was to someone like me — someone with multiple calendars, lists and maps who plans put every minute detail — but also how awesomely freeing it was to experience and to experience it with you.

Your outlook is refreshing. “It’s all part of the experience.” I don’t remember the events or circumstances that caused you to say that the first time but how comforting this phrase has been to us many, many times. I would not have got there on my own and love you for bringing me there.

Your childlike zest for life is fun to watch and is contagious.

Your mind is brilliant with ideas, both on-the-job and for our family.

You have passion for the talents and interests God has blessed you with. While I may not understand all the technical parts of the great ideas you come up with, I see the lightbulb go off in your head and see the excitement on your face. I see your eyes dance with glee over an idea that just might work.

You don’t let what others say or think bother you or get you down, and that makes you strong, independent and an all-around great person.

You are able to calm me when I need calming and help me see a new and fresh perspective on the things that stress me out.

I love that when you met me you said, “I want to be with a girl like that,” and I hope I am still that same girl you wanted. I hope life’s stresses and hardships do not rob you (or me) of that person you saw.

I remember crying every time I left you at the airport and praying for God to help me get me through the four long (but actually short) days you’d be gone. Four days without you felt like an eternity.

You are so strong in times of adversity, but when our six-month-old son was having brain surgery you fell to your knees in the hospital and cried and prayed. That wasn’t weakness, that was the love of a father for his son.

You love our children and make life fun for them. You make countless passes in the living room when they want to play football with you and pitched thousands of baseballs trying to help Finn get ready for coach pitch.

You check Finn’s school work on Mondays to make sure he’s doing well in math.

Finding time for each other now is harder — life is so busy — but we try and will keep trying.

I love that you believe in me, more than I am even capable of believing in myself.

I often take you for granted and for that I’m sorry.

I’m sorry that when you talked about someday walking across America I didn’t take you seriously. There is no one else I’d rather walk across America with than you.

For us, the Jerry Maguire line “You complete me” is all wrong. Our line is “You complement me.” Where I am weak, you are strong and thus make me stronger. I can plan the life out of a vacation and you can inject life back into it. When I stress out and you are able to make stress melt away.  You help me see things I don’t see on my own.

I love how my head fits in your shoulder and my hand fits in your always-warm hand. You are patient, and I love you for that too.

We are in this for the long haul. I still feel so new at this marriage thing, but wow, 11 years have passed. It’s been a roller coaster ride of school, job changes, moves and children, and now we are raising those children and have so much life together yet to enjoy.

I love you.

Thank you for choosing me. Thank you for marrying me. Thank you for staying with me. Thank you for loving me despite my faults.

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