My co-worker and fellow blogger shared this article with me in which the columnist challenged people, in the new year and the new decade, to look at a few things through fresh eyes. The writer listed 52 suggestions, one for every week of the year. This week’s topic is love.
“Loving someone does not simply mean doing things for them; it is much more profound… To love someone is to show to them their beauty, their worth and their importance; it is to understand them.” -– Jean Vanier
I want to be loved. There are people in my life who I love, very much, and people who love me in return. So I experience “love” in some sense of the word. But as part of rethinking “love” what I arrived at is that I want it, I crave it. I want to be accepted for who I am. And not only accepted, but cherished; not tolerated, but embraced.
I want to be valued. I want to be worth it — worth the trouble, worth the time, worth the sacrifice. I want to be found to be fun and enjoyable; useful and beneficial; attractive and pleasant.
The study I’m reading at church right now (Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul) is all about how God created women with a desire to be beautiful, with a desire to play an irreplaceable role, with a desire to be found lovely and to be delighted in. And unfortunately they’re often not, not by the people in their lives, and the sad result it that makes it even harder for them to fully accept God’s love. When we’re not loved, cherished, or delighted in, we start to believe there’s something wrong with us or that we’re unlovable or that we just have to work harder and then we’ll be loved. It’s frustrating and depressing to think of yourself in that way, yet so many women do.
I want to break free of that and believe first and foremost that God loves me in that way. That God accepts me and cherishes me and enjoys me and delights in me and sees value and worth in me — loves me.
I want to be loved like that by others too, and I want to love myself. I think I would be a more lovable person if I rested more in God’s love and loved myself.